The Astrological Spread

Difficulty: Complicated
The Astrological Tarot Spread is based upon houses of astrology. This complicated spread takes several steps to understand.
The first step is to interpret the tarot card for each individual position in the spread.
The second step involves further examination of the main axes. Positions 1 & 7 show the relationship theme, #1 representing the reader, #7 their partner. Positions 4 & 10 indicate motion. #4 indicates where the reader is now, and #10 suggests what they are moving towards.
The third step involves breaking down the chart into triads according to their house elements.
Positions 1, 5, & 9 represent the Fire triad, symbolising temperament and personal development.
Positions 2, 6, & 10 represent the Earth triad, concerned with materialism, money, and work.
Positions 3, 7, & 11 represent the Air triad, which has to do with thoughts, ideas, and connections with other people.
Positions 4, 8, & 12 represent the Water triad, the realm of emotions, moods, intuition, and yearnings.
Further, other patterns and correlations between certain numbers can be noted. Certain numbers such as the set of 5, 7, & 8 often speak about a particular theme.
Your Astrological Reading
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1: Basic Mood

An Homage to Kurosawa. Seven swords belonging to seven Samurai.
In a realistic movie, even masters can die, and life has a tendency to move like the most implausible plot.
2: Finance

Nature grows in the most desolate, diseased places. Study how nature does it to survive your own climate.
3: Mundane Life

I have no clue what I was thinking on this one. No clue, but if this card comes into play, remember to watch the horizon.
4: Home

4:00 – Card 5
Male, Air, Virgo.
A card of loneliness, disconnection and solitude. Also, a card of hope – If you have half of something it means the other half is out there somewhere. It may be far away, you may have to wade through the nastiest slums to find it, but when you do it's brilliant.
5: Fun Things

If you lost the means to do what you will, try retracing your steps. You had them before, you should be able to find them again. Unless they fell into the sewer, that would totally suck.
6: Work

10:00 – Card 4
Male, Earth, Libra.
Failure and Loss. Defeat and ruin. The higher it's built, the harder it falls and the more it crushes when it does. That doesn't necessarily mean it wasn't worth building. Defeat can be accepted and the ruins left behind in favour of greener pastures, or one can start to rebuild. The latter is more difficult, but often more rewarding.
7: Partners

Some cultures to this day place coins upon the eyes of the dead to pay the ferryman who will take them to the land of the dead. I'm guessing one eyed individuals travel at half fare and the blind go for free.
In reality, you can't take a cent with you. Spend it while you're alive.
8: Hidden Aspects

AKA 2angels1grail in traditional 4chan. If you're offended, figure out why you're offended and excise the weakness.
9: Higher Views

The guillotine is the most effective method of killing ever invented. You can poison or shock or stab or shoot people but nothing is so certain to cause death as severing their head. Amazing how fast the world forgot that.
10: Reputation

6:00 – Card 0
Male, Water, Pisces.
Ignorance is a trait of the most basic. To let the currents of time and fate dictate one's actions completely, to seek the lowest, easiest path will lead one downwards. One's hunger will destroy what's beautiful, resulting in the squandering of things put to better use.
11: Friends

Chaos is dangerous to both belligerents. If you have all the arms and all the thorns in the world, you're just as much a danger to yourself if you don't keep track of them.
12: Hopes and Fears

And two for my homies. Never forget past orthodoxies, past people or past events. Those who don't know their history aren't doomed to repeat it, they're doomed to fail history class and look like idiots. One feels no shame in repeating something they never saw in the first place, but stupidity is the greatest sin.