The Astrological Spread

Difficulty: Complicated
The Astrological Tarot Spread is based upon houses of astrology. This complicated spread takes several steps to understand.
The first step is to interpret the tarot card for each individual position in the spread.
The second step involves further examination of the main axes. Positions 1 & 7 show the relationship theme, #1 representing the reader, #7 their partner. Positions 4 & 10 indicate motion. #4 indicates where the reader is now, and #10 suggests what they are moving towards.
The third step involves breaking down the chart into triads according to their house elements.
Positions 1, 5, & 9 represent the Fire triad, symbolising temperament and personal development.
Positions 2, 6, & 10 represent the Earth triad, concerned with materialism, money, and work.
Positions 3, 7, & 11 represent the Air triad, which has to do with thoughts, ideas, and connections with other people.
Positions 4, 8, & 12 represent the Water triad, the realm of emotions, moods, intuition, and yearnings.
Further, other patterns and correlations between certain numbers can be noted. Certain numbers such as the set of 5, 7, & 8 often speak about a particular theme.
Your Astrological Reading
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1: Basic Mood

You can prefer quality over quantity or quantity over quality, but both are valid for different applications. Sometimes a lot of cheap crap does the job, sometimes fewer of the finest is better. Know which is which and don't mistake the two. When in doubt, go with tons of the best.
2: Finance

Classic iconography. Classic significance: Absolute destruction.
3: Mundane Life

Don't overlook a good solution just because it's obvious.
4: Home

A wand is a means to a magical end. If you don't like what you're seeing, use yours to change the channel.
5: Fun Things

The Vikings were once the most feared force on the northern seas, now they are remembered by statues, Swedish death metal, and Antonio Banderas movies. Do what you will to ensure your name, but once you're gone you have no control over what will become of it.
6: Work

Air conditioning is not a luxury, it's one of the most important things humankind ever invented. Comfort too is not to be taken lightly, if you aren't comfortable you can't enjoy what's before you, and if you can't enjoy what you've got, what's the point in living?
7: Partners

Heghlu'meH QaQ jajvam!
(Today is a good day to die!)
8: Hidden Aspects

Read 'The Ingenious Hidalgo Don Quixote of La Mancha', preferably the edition with illustrations by Gustav Dore. At the very least see the play 'Man of La Mancha'.
Mock what lunatics you may, but at some point you've been the fool too, and fools, whatever else they are, are also the best dreamers.
9: Higher Views

A whole lot of cargo looks minimal when it's loaded onto a gigantic ship. This applies to more than one might expect.
10: Reputation

10:00 – Card 4
Male, Earth, Libra.
Failure and Loss. Defeat and ruin. The higher it's built, the harder it falls and the more it crushes when it does. That doesn't necessarily mean it wasn't worth building. Defeat can be accepted and the ruins left behind in favour of greener pastures, or one can start to rebuild. The latter is more difficult, but often more rewarding.
11: Friends

AKA 2angels1grail in traditional 4chan. If you're offended, figure out why you're offended and excise the weakness.
12: Hopes and Fears

Things grow from other dead things. Don't overlook them for their dark origins, and don't dismiss the dead as a total erasure of what was.